I’m part of a Stay-at-Home Mom support group on Facebook, and it’s heartbreaking to see how many women feel stuck in unhealthy or imbalanced relationships. A common pattern emerges—many of these women manage the majority of household and childcare responsibilities, yet feel unseen, unsupported, or emotionally drained. Despite this, many feel uncertain about leaving or changing their situation.

One important lesson I’ve learned is the value of building a life rooted in self-respect and personal goals, rather than centering everything around a partner or relationship. When you invest in your own growth and clarity, it becomes easier to recognize who truly supports and uplifts you.

That's the grand prize in life—reaching your highest potential!

Think about the countless people who fought, struggled, and even sacrificed their lives so you could have the chance to achieve your dreams. Each morning, it’s nothing short of remarkable that you have the opportunity to create the life you desire, surrounded by the people you choose. Isn't the very fact that you're alive, with this incredible chance before you, all you truly need? You can start taking bold moves toward your vision with the Happier Mom Daily Celebration Journal (included in the Happier Mom App), your gateway to personal growth and transformation!

When I dated in the past, I ignored warning signs that I now recognize as red flags. Over time, I learned that prioritizing a partner’s character, emotional maturity, and willingness to grow matters far more than charm or surface-level attraction. Here are some signals to be mindful of:

• Poor Communication Skills: A lack of openness, active listening, or clarity in communication can create misunderstandings and emotional distance in a relationship.
• They Don’t Validate Your Emotions: If they consistently dismiss or invalidate your feelings, it can create a toxic dynamic where your emotional needs are unmet.
• Bad Habits: Pay attention to recurring behaviors that could indicate deeper issues. Habits like excessive drinking, smoking, substance abuse, obsessive gaming, or excessive consumption of porn can lead to long-term problems and may be hard to break.
• Coming on Too Strong Sexually: If someone is overly aggressive or pushy with sexual advances early in the relationship, it can be a red flag for disrespecting boundaries and a lack of self-control. A healthy relationship should progress naturally, with mutual respect and comfort.
• Flirting with Other Women: If your partner flirts with other women in your presence, it shows a blatant lack of respect and commitment.
• Closed-Minded Attitude: A partner who holds prejudiced views or is not open to your political, religious, or spiritual beliefs is unlikely to be respectful, kind, or open-minded, which can create significant tension and conflict in the relationship.
• They Would Choose Their Family Over You: If they consistently prioritize their family over you, it may indicate that they aren’t ready to fully commit to building a life with you.
• Stingy or Poor Money Management: Being excessively stingy with money, especially in areas like tipping or shared expenses, can reveal selfishness or insecurity. Similarly, poor money management skills that lead to financial instability can strain the relationship over time.
• Constant Stress or Lack of Ambition: If your partner is consistently stressed or complaining about work without making efforts to improve their situation, it may indicate a negative outlook on life. Likewise, a lack of personal or professional goals can show a lack of direction and drive, potentially holding you back from achieving your own aspirations.
• Poor Eye Contact: Inconsistent or lack of eye contact can signal dishonesty, low confidence, or a lack of genuine interest in you.
• Incompatible Walking Pace: This might seem minor, but walking at different paces can reflect a lack of synchronization in the relationship. It could indicate impatience or a lack of attentiveness.

To gauge whether a potential partner possesses good character, notice whether you feel safe, nurtured, and respected around them (consider making this a mandatory requirement of your relationship and clearly communicating it at the beginning), and observe how they behave in different situations:

• Reaction to Your Career Goals: A supportive partner will encourage and celebrate your ambitions, not belittle or undermine them.
• Interaction with Strangers: How they treat people they don't know can reveal a lot about their true nature.
• On Dates: Notice whether they are thoughtful and considerate when planning and during your time together.
• On Trips: Traveling together often brings out a person's true character. Notice how they handle stress, planning, and new experiences.
• In Everyday Tasks: Notice whether they naturally contribute and take initiative during ordinary activities like grocery shopping, cooking, or errands—this reveals whether they’re practical, helpful, and a true teammate.
• Playing Games: Their attitude during games can be telling—are they overly competitive and arrogant, or do they enjoy the experience and show good sportsmanship?
• When You're Sick: A partner who cares for you when you're unwell shows empathy and dedication.
• With Your Family, Friends, and Kids: Observe if they show respect, kindness, and genuine interest in the people who matter most to you.

Value yourself and your body, and don’t rush into intimacy out of pressure, charm, or the promise of security. Saying “no” can be difficult, but it’s a powerful act of self-respect. Take time to observe actions, not just words. You’re not looking for perfection—only someone willing to show up, grow, and build a healthy partnership with you.

Here’s to wishing you the best of luck in your romantic ventures!

P.S. On a side note, the court papers processed quicker than expected and I’m now officially single :)